Hi mum just sitting here thinking of you.im in our flat and its so strange for you not to be sitting in the chair chatting and laughing with me.i dont know what to do with myself.miss you so so much and its only got worse with time cause i havent seen you for so long.its so hard to go from seeing you every single day to you just not being there anymore.i just cant except it.i keep getting flash backs lately of time spent with you and things you said to me and for a split moment in time its like it hasnt happened and its like your there.then the flash back stops and the reality of whats happened hits and i get stomach pains and have this strange pain that shoots through my body an i close my eyes tight till it passes.i know this is just the pain i feel cause i love you so much and my body is trying to cope with your loss.you were and are everything to me because of you i got to know what true unconditional love was.you were center of my universe and i will never be the same person without you.the pain is constant and endless and i will carry it with me till im with you again.i just wanted to tell you thankyou for being my mum i dont know if i ever said that to you.i was truely blessed for the short time i had you here and i want you to know i was always so proud of you.my truely amazing mum love you endless xxxxxxxxxxxx