hello my beautiful mum thought about you all day in work today.i miss coming home after work and us getting our tea and gossiping about the day.i looked forward to it.i dread when my day is coming to a end now and i know your not going to be there.my pain is unbearable some days.i dont know how im going to get through without you mum.its such a struggle every single day.you were just so wonderful to me in every way all the time,like i was the only thing that mattered to you,you made me feel so loved so secure.i always knew no matter what you would be there unconditionaly.its so hard not to have you there now.i feel so lost.i know i was so lucky to have you whilst you were here.it just wasnt enough time and now i have to live the rest of my life without you,without your love and without your advice and friendship without the safety and security of having a mum who loves me no matter what.i had so much planned for your future you know,wanted to do so much for you.i still cant believe it think im still in shock.so please mum will you send me some of your strengh to help me through because its so so hard and i cant do it without you.ive tried.love you more than life itself always xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx